“I find it very abusive to put pressure on men to provide us with a life we cannot provide for ourselves as women. As much as women are not rehabilitation centres for badly raised men, men are not poverty eradication plans for lazy women – tweeted Funke Fatai.
This tweet reminds me of a conversation I had with a young woman who sells waakye in Lomnava, Accra on Friday.
After a bowl of the mouth-watering food I describe the best meal ever a homo sapien has discovered, from no where a conversation ensued.
And I found myself contributing to a discourse she had started with my friend about men being irresponsible.
I hardly respond to such series of prepositions knowing that they are borne out of frustrations and hatred. But this time around I wanted to make her refrain from making such unguided statement in the future.
I didn’t get the head and tail of her argument monitoring from afar because honestly, she was spewing gibberish.
She was of the view that men’s whole responsibility in the home is to take care of the house and everything within.
Food for the family, shelter, provide for the kids, wife and, foot the bills these and many she said were the responsibilities of the man.
To sound stupid and make it obvious how shallow minded she is, she backed her nonsensical debate with the Bible though she could not quote a single scripture to buttress her point.
And even after my friend read out a Bible verse kind courtesy an application on his cellphone to disregard her pronouncement, she maintained her stance.
Upsettingly, she added unashamedly men must bear the expense of their wives hairdo, and that it’s unfortunate 21st century men are stingy reason majority of them are unmarried.
Amidst stressing throughout the chit-chat what the wife spends her salary on is none of her husband’s business — she quizzed if a man wouldn’t be able to cater for a woman’s need, why marry her? A claim I’ve overheard women say, and read several articles about mostly penned down by African women.
Barely three years ago a female colleague of mine, Priscilla, echoed what I’ve come to realize is causing the break up of many marriages.
She said a man’s money tastes sweeter than woman’s hence no matter how rich or how much a woman is being paid a man must provide for her like she’s a housewife.
I was startled she could make such ridiculous claim because she was a married woman.
These statements, I have long seen as funny albeit stupid for any woman to think men must do everything for them including removing their pantie during love making. lol.
Of course men have obligations to fulfill in the home and no excuse need to be given to forgo such responsibilities unless maybe the situation at hand prevents them from doing so.
Nonetheless it is no wrong for a man to decide to provide 100% of all his wife’s needs and everything if it is within his means.
Apparently, that should not be a yardstick for wives to be overly reliable on their husbands with the stone age theory at the back of their minds.
I told the light skin color waakye seller it will be kind on the part of men to willingly pay for their wives hairdo and not something compulsory or a necessity.
And oh she told us no woman will agree to marry us if we do not change our mentality towards such things and start treating women as demigods.
However, I paused for a long time starring at her and amused at her foolishness to have even thought of that in the first place.
At the end, i humbly told her if no woman will walk down the aisle with us, at least, not every woman thinks like her and that I know for sure that my best friend, Dorinda Love Wilson Mensah, and a couple of female friends are reasonable enough not to depend on men solely for everything so she should wise up.
At this juncture, let’s say we men will be providing everything for our wives but let me ask, are they saving their money for their casket?